Fight Club: Time out your friends!

How to Join

Hycutype complained loudly enough that Failstream was forced to make Fight Club™ an opt-in game. In order to start playing, whisper failsbeard the phrase !opt-in (/w failsbeard !opt-in).

You may opt out at any time with !opt-out, but your score will be reset to 0 if you opt-in again.

Rules of the Game

The rules of Fight Club™ are simple.

  1. Never stop talking about Fight Club™.
  2. Never stop talking about Fight Club™.
  3. Type !attack <username> [cheer<n>] in a whisper to failsbeard (or the main channel if you are cheering), a few dozen 100-sided dice are rolled, some complicated math / interpretive dance happens behind the scenes, there's a formal vote taken in the British Parliament as to who won, most of that is ignored, and the bot responds with the results. These results are highly skill dependent. In particular, how close to a caress your touch is when pressing the c key and how well timed your k is after that caress have the greatest impact on your odds of winning.

    In order to !attack, both you and the person you are attacking must have at least one non-deleted message in the past ten minutes. After you attack, there is a 3-minute cooldown before you can !attack again. The person you !attack, whether or not they actually get timed out, also has a 5-minute period in which they cannot be !attacked. These "invincibilty frames" are lost if you attack someone during that 5-minute period. You can get around both of these cooldowns with bribery.

Fight Outcomes

Assuming you're up against someone with equal keyboarding skill, these are the odds of each outcome.

OddsResultAttacker score changeDefender score change
3%Critical loss: attacker is timed out for 60 seconds-15+30
9%Heavy loss: attacker is timed out for 20 seconds-5+10
36%Loss: attacker is timed out for 10 seconds-3+5
7%Draw: Both attacker and defender are timed out for 1 second# defender's messages deleted / 2# attacker's messages deleted / 2
33%Win: defender is timed out for 10 seconds3 + # messages deleted / 2-3
9%Heavy win: defender is timed out for 20 seconds5 + # messages deleted / 10-7
3%Critical win: defender is timed out for 60 seconds15 + # messages deleted / 10-20
100%(Suicide) Timed out for between 10-120 seconds-seconds timed out / 5

If you are a subscriber, you have a 5% bonus on both attacking and defending.

Additionally, there is a 7% chance on an !attack win that you will not break a sweat, and you will have no cooldown before your next attack.

If you wrote the Fight Club™ bot, there ought to be a 50% bonus on attacking and defending, but there isn't.

"But dx," you might be asking, "that would mean that you are more likely to lose than win when !attacking. Why should I attack?" Well, my friend, like the lottery, you gotta play to win.

You'll also note there is an advantage for attacking people who are most active in chat.

Special Outcomes

There are some rare events that affect the whole chat. I'll fill in the details as they occur.

OddsResultAttacker score changeDefender score change
0.2%???+20 + messages deleted / 3+10
0.1%???20 + messages deleted / 10+10
Bribery is Encouraged

You can bribe EnderofGames by attacking with a cheer of 10 or more! Cheering will allow you to ignore invicibility frames as well as your own cooldown. While most !attacks can only occur in whispers to failsbeard, cheers can only occur in main chat, so !attacks with bribes happen there.

Every 100 bits earns you a 3% advantage on your roll, up to 1000 bits or 30%. Beware, while you can gain a substantial advantage, if you lose, you get timed out even longer. Additionally, any bribe less than 50 bits will earn you a negative bonus on your attack roll, and some harsh mocking from the bot.

Most importantly, it helps support our favorite streamer! That's right, Freakin_HA! Go give him a follow at


Items have various effects on the game. There are positive and negative items, and we're slowly adding more. Most items can be stolen by attacking the person.

Unless otherwise specified, items have the following odds of being stolen:

VIP and Positive items
  • When attacking:
    • 50% on win.
    • 75% if the defender takes heavy damage.
    • 100% if the defender is crit.
  • When defending:
    • 100% if the attacker is crit.
Negative items
  • When attacking:
    • 30% on win.
    • 50% if the defender takes heavy damage.
    • 100% if the defender is crit.
  • When defending:
    • 20% if the attacker loses or takes heavy damage.
    • 100% if the attacker is crit.
Item NameEffectChance of being stolenNotesItem code
VIP items
The Longest BeardGrants the owner VIP status.

Mods cannot receive this item.

Only one VIP item may be held at a time.

The Baldest HeadbaldestHead
The Golden SNESgoldenSNES
The Onion% WRonion
Yoshi's Lab CoatyoshiLabCoat
Positive items
Modrig CouponEvery other viewer level played will be that of the owner of this item if they have one in the queue. Otherwise, a random level will be picked.100% on win when attacking.
100% when the attacker takes heavy damage or is crit.
50% on draw when attacking or defending.

This item cannot be stolen when bribing.

Whoever holds this item can always be attacked regardless of whether they've said anything in chat recently.

Ender's GoodnightAttack cooldown is reduced by half.goodnight
Barb's Get Well CardDefender's iframes are reduced by half.getWell
Captain Sarah's HatIncreases likelihood of stealing an item by 10%.captHat
Warspyking's Cape TechThe next hit is guaranteed to win if it is not a catastrophe. Grants the attacker invincibility frames after a win.Passed to the defender of the attack upon being attacked.capeTech
DPC's Sideways Spring1 in 3 chance that attacks against you will be redirected onto a random player.

Points are awarded to or detracted from the new target, as are invincibility frames. 2 points are granted to the holder of this item when it procs.

Because it was too hard to program otherwise, when redirecting an attack, it ignores the new target's iframes.

DPC's Sideways Spring is bypassed with a bribe.

TavikKalec's High ScorecardScore from losses is multiplied by 1.5. Score from everything else is doubled.scoreCard
Marie's Pendant of Contempt25% chance when attacked that the attack will be ignored.

On proc, the attacker is not penalized with a cooldown, but the defender does get invincibility frames.

Marie's Pendant of Contempt cannot be bypassed with a bribe.

dx_over_dt's Cheat EarringsDon't do anything, but they feel like they do something. At least they look nice.cheatEarrings
Negative items
Poo's Token of ChatsplainingThe next !attack, regardless of target, targets the holder of this item. The attack is guaranteed to win.Item is consumed after one attack.Awarded to backseaters.pooToken
Frankie's Level-creating AptitudeAwarded to people who make obnoxious levels.frankieLevel
Todesrolle's Charismatic CharmThere's a 1.5% chance on normal attacks and a 5% chance on suicides that the holder of this item will be banned for 30, 60, or 90 seconds. The odds of triggering this effect on a suicide can be increased via bribery, 3% per 50 bits up to 1000 bits.Triggering this effect awards the attacker with an additional point per second the holder of this item is banned.todesCharm
MrSamMcSamface's TTS Spam-Canceling TapeScore from losses is doubled. Score from everything else is halved.ttsTape
Carl's Twice Twice GlassesThere is a 5% chance that any of the owner's messages in chat will be deleted. There is a 100% chance that highlighted messages by the owner will be deleted. This effect cannot happen more than once every 30 seconds.twiceTwice
Invitational Cookie

You were invited to Fight Club™. Hooray!

Gives you five points the next time you attack or are attacked.

Item is consumed after one attack.cookie
You cannot opt out of Fight Club™ if you hold a negative item.
Chat Commands
CommandEffectChat roomsExample
!attack, !, Attacks a player.whisper to failsbeard unless bribing, then Stream Chat.!attack todesrolle
! todesrolle cheer50
!opt-inJoins the game.whisper to failsbeard!opt-in
!opt-outQuits the game. Opting out deletes your score.whisper to failsbeard!opt-out
!rankDisplays your score and rank.whisper to failsbeard!rank
!myitemsLists the items you currently own. Lists the items owned by the specified user if specified.whisper to failsbeard!myitems
!myitems TavikKalec
!itemownerDisplays the current owner of the specified chat, whisper to failsbeard!itemowner modrig
!giveGives the specified item to the specified user. Mod only chat, whisper to failsbeard!give frankieLevel Hycutype
!takeTakes the specified item from the specified user. Mod only chat, whisper to failsbeard!take captHat SarahTheRed
Cookies (Stream Points)

You can use Cookies to do things in Fight Club™! Cookies are Failstream's version of Twitch's channel points. The more you watch Failstream, the more cookies you'll receive. Check out how to earn stream points here.

Steal an Item

For 2,500 cookies, you can steal any item from anyone (including unowned items). Specify the item code found in the items table.

Invite someone to Fight Club™

For just 20,000 cookies, you can "invite" someone to join Fight Club. Select the reward and type in the name of the person you want to invite. Not only will the join Fight Club automatically, but they'll be given a complimentary Invitational Cookie. No refunds for mistyped usernames, sorry.

Tear 'Em Down

Does someone have too many points? Don't worry! The top 5 attackers have a reduced chance of defending against your attacks. Attacks against the top attacker have a 5% bonus of success. Attacks against 2nd place have a 4% bonus and so on. If you are sitting somewhere between 2nd and 5th place, !attacks against people below you have the same odds as normal (0% bonus). Attacks against people above you have 1% per rank difference bonuses. For example, if you are in 4th place and attack someone in 2nd place, you have a 2% bonus to your attack succeeding.

How are messages counted?

The server keeps track of the last 200 messages sent in the previous 10 minutes.

What are the messages when you attack the streamer or bot from?

Ye olde EverQuest.

Who gets items named after them?

People who have been around in Fail's chat for a while and have some meme or achievement that translates well to an item.

Can I get an item named after me?

If you have a good idea and the price is right, probably! Join the Discord Server, and we'll see what can happen. I'm serious about the bribe though. (I'm very, very poor.) The price will depend on how much of a community member you already are in Fail's chat, how good the idea is, and how difficult it would be to program.