The schedule for Sunday, December 9th, 2018:

Super Mario Maker
100-man Super Experts
1:167:57 pm-9:13 pm
  • Had troubles with the very first jump

  • Didn't trust chat when they said that donating $1/hr of Fail streaming would give him money enough to travel to Neptune, thereby granting him the title of "Best Beard on Neptune"

  • Lowered the bar for the definition of "legend" to mean "beating FF3 in 100-man Super Expert"

  • No longer believes in himself (and his ability to perform midairs)

Super Smash Bros. Ultimate
2:299:13 pm-11:43 pm
  • Mistook Dark Pit for "Dark Paulina", presumably from Super Mario Odyssey, but who does not actually exist. All signs point to either early-onset dementia or severe far-sightedness

  • Somehow believes that "items" is a thing in Smash Bros

  • "Someone took my spot." Indicative of severe narcissism, believing that he deserves a spot in every game simply by virtue of being the "streamer".

  • "Let me eat somebody!" Indicative of malnourishment, probably due to insufficient supply depots. Also raises concerns regarding cannibalism.

  • Halfway through decided he was too good for items. Confirmed: Fail hates fun.

  • Under the belief that increasing his "GSP" (Global Smash Power) will give his life meaning. It won't.

  • Abandoned all hope that Waluigi will earn a place among the thousands of Smash Ultimate characters.

2:0711:43 pm-1:50 am
  • Blames controller for lack of ski-- erm, success

  • Sacrificed dozens of innocent souls to collect fruit

  • Flat out ignored the game's advice when specifically told that the advice comes from the pragmatic part of the main character

  • Identified "nasty stuff". Immediately touched it.

  • 290 deaths

Mario Tennis Aces
0:511:50 am-2:42 am
  • Like watching Federrer vs Nadal themselves, only entirely unimpressive

  • Lag: it's like slow mo, just involuntarily

A True Crime Story starring Keanu Reeves
0:222:42 am-3:04 am
  • Rita made up for Hand Simulator with this instant classic

FTL: Faster than Light
0:403:04 am-3:45 am
  • Died in sector 2, just as Ender predicted

A Hat in Time
2:023:45 am-5:47 am
  • "That is one thicc 8-year-old"

  • 'Twas at this point that insomnia's counterpart caught up with dx_over_dt, and she was forced to retire, thus depriving you all of the ever-important stream notes for the remaining games

Clone Drone in the Danger Zone
0:425:47 am-6:29 am
Jackbox Party Pack 3/4
1:576:29 am-8:27 am
Bonus games (if there is time)
Super Amazing Wagon Adventure

Stream notes:

  • Fail told us not to submit Mario & Luigi: Partners in Time, promising to play it during the course of regular streams. This hoodwink resulted in a complete absence of Toads impersonating Christopher Walkin.